emo songs made me feel better i guess. maybe they arent that emo, its just that those lyrics sound rather meaningful and mean much to me... well, for a while, i thought im going to give up or something similar. like stop studying and all that. you know, its just so demoralising when everyone looks at your results and ask, "what? you failed your english? how can that be? please la, stop playing already la, study hard or you want die arh?" others even worse, scolding me stupid. sighh. who understands? now i know i probably wont get into NJ. cmon la, in singapore, as long as you fail your ENGLISH, that's it, your life's over. so what if this is term one? it still counts 15% hello? i know this is nort o levels yet. but im still angry. yes i am. im USELESS. what, so waht if i can do well maths? big deal? i rather sacrifice both A1s for my english then. HA. impossible. and ppl listen up, im sadd nort bcos my parents will nag, ground, disown, slap, scold or whack me. do i look like i give a damn, furthermore, they will only sign the paper and stare at me. thats all. its just that i set very high expectations for myself, and when i dont achieve it, its as great as asking me to slash myself. okay, that was a stupid example, but i wont do it. you know its damn disappointing when the teachers need to constantly remind you, and that i probably left a bad impression on mrs cheong? crapp. whats the use of giving me tuition and all that then la. NOT MY FAULT! forget it. im die die going to make myself get an A the next time round. AHMAD, YOU GOTTA TREAT ME TO ICE CREAM IF I CAN REALLY MAKE IT, AND THIS TIME ROUND, YOU BETTER IT AND DONT BREAK YOUR PROMISE OR I WILL BREAK YOUR NECK. (:

anw, today school was rather short since i left class early to go for the anglican high school's softball match. we won!! and their school is freaking big with indoor stadium and heritage centre. haha. well, afterall it is a boarding school and their school canteen sell such expensive food!! haha. i was whole time screaming and im feeling sick now. oh ya, and then they have got many cute guys i wanted to ask number for. maybe i should right? oops. haha. time for dinner now but im nort eating and i wonder whyy. blah blah, i need ice cream to fill me up and cool myself down. (: