not again. the season's coming back. damn. i know im nort gonna heal till late april. hope you guys can bear with my freaking irritating attitude problem for a while, will ya? im under too much stress. and that includes the most important one, my term one results. whateva it is man, thats not the main thing. its that, I WANT TO GET SOME THINGS OFF MY DAMN HEAD.

maybe im thinking of the wrong person now. maybe its not right. maybe i shouldnt miss that fella at all. cmon, its more than a year back since i last been to the playground, where it used to be my favourite hang out. its been more than 2 years since i last been to the shopping centre where my first date is at. HA. well, i had just been to both these places recently to get some of those feelings back and see how they are now. surprisingly, they remained as vivid as ever even though everything there might have changed totally. but i knwo what im doing now. hmm, its hard, so hard to describe how it feels like. and even if i honeslty said it out, who would believe? ppl will think that im stupid and mad. i dont ask for anyone's understanding, i just want one person to trust me.

and i think i shouldnt take cab ever again. the driver cheated me 3bucks! ): so evil. im angry.

a message to the previous owner of the green little turtle:

thanks, thanks for being so understanding. you mean a lot to me. you mean more than just a friend, you are a special friend. you are always there when i needed you, and we have been through quite alot for the past year. i enjoy studying with you, chatting outside class and through msn. i know i have hurt you but i know i will have to do it cos its only fair this way. so sorrie, my decision was made but the person chosen isnt you. at least i know its not gonna affect this friendship and lets work towards NJ, shall we? dont think so much, i will return you what i owe you some day! (: smile more like what you always do to cheer me up. hah.

anyway, i named the green little turtle you gave me. its called COLOURS. once again, sorrie, and thanks alot. friends forever, take care and iloveyou.

sometimes, i do wonder if i made the correct choice. i keep questioning myself...



hey girl, you sure you are not gonna regret? you sure you are gonna be happy and satisfied like that? are you seriously gonna give up your dreams becos of someone you think is important to you but is that person really that important? girl, are you still in playing mood or have you think it through? please, please not let history repeat itself. no one's gonna help you decide and you cant blame anyone if anything goes wrong.

back. rather moody. why?

right, let me just update on this three busy days with a short post before im leaving and let this blog die for 5days.

valentine's day had been a good day for me this year. and i shall rememberr 13o2o7. ((: its cool. really. i received sooooo many prezzies, especially a few that i like a lot like... THE MINI CUTE GREEN TURTLE!! my fav. hehe. and of course, i love the rose by dean too. its gonna wilt anw. )): and ya, thanks guys for all those food. its the thought that counts. apologise for not buying anything!!

AEM's coming to an end. end of stress but end of fun too. end of experimenting food!! haha. well, everything's gotta come to an end. hmm, face the fact.

anw, also MADE UP WITH SOMEONE*. haha. that idiot... EVERYTHING'S HIS FAULT!! haha, he's definitely someone who can make me laugh in tears of anger. LOL. what a mixed feeling. hmm, anw, im in the wrong too la. let's be back to the special friends we were used to, shall we?

school's been stressed too. blah blah. lousy maths test results. been studying like madddddddddd ESPECIALLY FOR MY MOTHER TONGUE!! omg, my mock exam is nearing. noooooooooo

one last thing, im convinced, not to leave anymore. ((:



MISSME!! will be back soon. be patient! happy chinese year!

should i, or should i not?

suddenly i was just bored, and that i feel so confused up, i decided to blog. but when i come to this page, my mind seems to go totally blank, like as if i cant express out everything, and i start wondering whyy i even feel this wayy. so what's been into me, making me feel irritated and stuff like that? im sure there's many reasons behind this but there can only be a main one. i havent slept well last night, just by thinking through what we used to do can already take up four hours of my sleep, i wonder what will happen if i start rmb all those small little incidents that happened the past one year, 365 days. its sounded real long, but seems short to me. that's it, its over. well, i guess i dont want to have anything to do with it anymore, and shall start anew nerdy guoyi life peacefully.

you just dont know how pathetic it is to hold on to something that is not coming back. then maybe i should just let go.

and i know i have to say this, cos i really cant keep it inside and cry it out all alone and let you know nothing bout it. i really hesitated before i dump and abandon that present. you just dont know how long it took me to just wrap it up, save money and buy it and actually bother to go out late at night just choosing it. yet, its not appreciated. who knows how it feels like? the kinda feeling, where you stabb straight into my heart and pretended you did nothing, acting like as if you dont give a damn and you just dont have time. but after sooo much that i have said, do you actually understand? i thought you would take some initiative to get back, but no? fine, like what my yoges-gor said. you gotta move on in life if you really had made up you mind, no use wasting time there. you never know cos whens theres a lost, theres a gain.

my dad's nagging behind me, for im not having dinner again. that's for a week already. im really nort anorexic, its just that the nuggets, chocolate ice cream cake, mentos and sweet drinks are filling my stomach up. you know, my gastric isnt good, so it tends to get upset when i stuff it with junk. ahh, let it be then, you can take it guoyi, so no worries. (: at least there's no abalone for dinner tonight, HA-HA. oh ya, i thought i would be able to see him tmr if i go to IJC, but looks like i cant be bothered to go. whyy do i care? BUT I STILL CARE.

ended school early today so went home to take my flour and chocolate hersey's syrup and rush back sg poly to continue my ice cream making. its sucked. it really did. cos i hate it to see it when it fails, and when it doesnt turn out to what i expect, i throw them away. so can you imagine how many times i tried making? im just wasting food la cmon, guoyi, you are a loser, give up man. give up like what you always do. stop being a perfectionist when you get nothing right. heyy look, you not only skipped training already but also go add on weight by eating those rubbish there, worth it nort? well, it doesnt make much diff. and im talking to myself again.

and you know what, i gotta pretend everything's just fine from now on. ((: smile, cos you never who's falling for it. and im lying to myself again. i just cant do it.









and if you really care, do take a peek inside the yellow dustbin outside the school canteen soon. cos there's where i hid your little plant wrapped in a red paper inside a white plastic bagg. but its fine if you are giving up like what im doing, cos it would die anyway. even if you really did, so what? you never get to read the letter i wrote and the message i wanted to convey to you. its okay, when i threw the gift in, i told myself not to look back, cos once i do, i know i wouldnt be able to stop all these.
and im finally seeing the sad ending to this fairytale. it concluded with the princess leaving the palace all alone crying. morale of the story: the king is not to be trusted.

i know you are reading this, you definitely will. that's cos i know you having been wanting to know what's happening in my life, that's whyy you wouldnt miss out this post as well. okay, even though i didnt say sorrie right in front of you, i hope you understand that i mean it cos this misunderstanding only sinks deeper day after day and at last things seem to be clearer now. and i really dont wish for much like getting back into the past and be as close as ever cos i no longer wanna take you for granted or being selfish. i know you are not mine, i know we can only remain like that. i have given up, on myself, not you. time has proven that im a failure. you know, i just hope that we can still get together once in a while to catch up and i believe its more than enough for me. since we are each going on different ways now, having our own world, own things to do, lets not bother each other anymore and give each other more freedom and space. i rmb it used to be hard for me to accept this but now, i truly understand, get whats all these are about. i know we will never forget the times we ever had together, be it the laugher or the tears, its kept there in my heart and locked up already. thank God for your existence and may He bless you.

im finally back home! after being escorted by mr khabir all the way onto the cab. haha. he's been a really nice and sweet guy. thanks CARbear!! ((: luckily i havent been kidnapped with him around. hehe.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUNYEE. not again. im repeating it like my mom, so naggy! oh well, anw, she received sooooo many presents and honestly, MUNYEE, IM JEALOUS AND ENVY YOU!! its okay, i know my turn will come. ahaha. hope it will be as lively and great as today then. but guess not. ahh, nvm. munyee, hope you enjoyed your day and that you will love your many many presents. rmb that we are going out for a dinner for sushi tmr night okay? ((:

school was freaking tiring today. went to the dentist okay. and he really made my day. im mouth was freaking shut for two hours after recess cos its soooo numb and i had a real bad headache after that too. sighh. hope im not sick yet! and then i had to drag myself to attend AEM and i was really irritated by then but i try as much not to dampen birthday's girl mood too. haha. went back school after that and got on bus with a group of soccer boys, a bunch of idiotic noisy freaks!! haha. guess what they did on the bus? they bullied my friend's friend. lol. nothing better to do. they kept asking for the girls no. and really freaked them out. haha. and anyway, i finally got zhen yuan's no.!! i waited hell long to actually be daring enough to open my mouth and ask that question since we are always fated enough to meet on the bus. he changed so much that i cant really recognise him but luckily he called out to me. haha. although he wasnt very sure if it was me. afterall, its been five years, my first... no, maybe second? crush. (TOP SECRET. xD) but yaa anw back here, i had fun with the guys cos its been a long time since i really hanged out with them and talk. of course, this time was different, i was the only girl then, innocently stared and followed them around. haha. then after that we proceeded to the mcdonalds and clementi even though i was supposed to go home!! so freaking late then. but i guess once in a while is alright. we joked and all that, creating hell in the place. that really reminded me of the past one whole year. everything changed in this 365 days, like nobody's business. haha. i should be learning to cope with the new environment and get used to it.
but hey look, did i make the correct choice by leaving them? they havent once abandoned me, but i did neglect them. sorrie.

had my dinner again. not again, you know what is it, ABALONE. gosh, at least its cooked in noodles soup today, i found it better. HAHA. cos actually i gave all the pieces to my sis and ate the noodles only. hmm. i really hope i can get over this season soon. those money spent are more than enough for me to eat 351 thousand nuggets! btw, another two hours infront of the computer. okay, my eyes are going blur, i dont wannt become a four eyed nerd!! well, been doing my powerpoint presentation for my AEM and so while digging out some photos, i saw this:

OKAY, I KNOW MY HAIR'S MESSY AND I APOLOGISE FOR THAT COS IT WAS REALLY WINDYYYYYYYYYY. BUT GUESS WHAT?! IF YOU'RE OBSERVANT ENOUGH, YOU WOULD HAVE REALISED I WAS MUNCHING AWAY A HUGE FISHBALL, HALF OF IT ON SIMIN'S HAND!! (:

taken on o3o2o7 on munyee's advanced bday party. taken once on the camera, kept forever in the heart. ((:

MUNYEE, I LOVE YOU!! ((:

confession of princess WU.

just came home from the obs check up. and my com is rather laggy after not using for months and im uploading some songs so its making it worse and slower... what to do? today i got so freaking distracted during maths lessons thanks to some music coming from nowhere and its a song, called the rose. i just love it so much that what do you think? i cant even concentrate for what's ms ang is talking bout! sigh. i just hope it wont happen again. itss really a nice song! (: okay, wait, back to my check up at clementi polyclinic with darren, henglun and doyle. maybe with munyee nad dave at first too. but they left soon after since the clinic after take so freaking long to just attend to a a patient. cant blame myself. its just fro the sake of convienence and the price. haha. due to my old injury at my kneecap and asthma, the doctor said she will write a letter over for the obs ppl and then let them decide whether i can attend la. sighh. im fine with anything. (;

just managed to contact mr tseng. arhh, sorta missed him i admit. nobody there to really talk to and treat me ice cream!! haha. hmm, tmr is munyee's bday so i might just be too busy to blog tmr, and i shall officially wish my darling a HAPPY SWEET 15 BIRTHDAY here now!! the next one is me yeahh? then we will have the IC together. hehe. ahh, im still younger than you! hmm, looking forward to see you tmr even though we celebrated your bday. and we cant celebrate my bday cos i will be obs. )): dont worrie. will miss ya. haha. take care kayy, grandmama, all the best for everything and God bless! (: ohya, maybe should go fetch mye chit at airport too! im getting excited. haha. well, anw, if benjamin you are reading this, i gotta tell you that im not going down to your school to watch the soccer match so so sorrie! )):

i just realised mye chit is coming soon! whee. that's cos the o levels results are coming out. good luck to everyone and that includes my sis, marla and jingfang who are not reading this! haha. okay, maybe to vid for her higher mother tongue too. hmm.

and my wrist is still pain. i realised im typing so slowly cos i became a leftie. but surprisingly im still good at it. and you know what? i sat in front of the computer for two hours already without doing anything!! i need to study now. so GOODBYE. tmr need see doc. but i still havent decide whether to turn up for OBS. so many pros and cons like its on my birthday but its once in a life time. so many are going and encourage me to go but my parents are apparently against it. so hwo? one last day to decide. anyone wanna change my mind? haha. i think my main reason i dont wanna go is cos i dont wanna leave my munyee alone in school. and the reason i insist in going cos i get to make friends, take the jetty and leave in some kampong liked place. haha.

just finised my abalone meal dinner again. zz. ppl are telling me im rich when im not. i just dont see why my dad had to force me to finish up totally something that i dislike even though it may be exorbitant. well, look, its barely just a spongy fishball-liked thing. i would rather eat a week of nuggets than rather eating that thing okay? hmm, but honestly, maybe i still prefer sharkfin. haha. i wonder what's up with my dad cooking those stuff these days. trying to experiment something if im not wrong yeah? rawr, better not anymore! im dying of that. haha. who knows maybe its just poisonous! okay, then maybe i should be dead by now. i be glad so. anw, i do hope that my addict and urge for eating nuggets doesnt grow anymore cos im really freaking out at the rate im eating now. the nugget posioned has successfully been planted into guoyi!! gosh, help me. does anyone know of a hotline to dail if you are under nuggets eating disorder? maybe i can built a rehabilation centre and be the consultant myself. (: haha.

whee, im mood-swinging again. and im reallllllyyyyy apologetic bout that. SORRIE. i cant help it, i really cant. PMS. )): i know i shouldnt have showed attitude these days, all act like as if im a depressed fellow. maybe i shouldnt have been a moment angry, and the other moment irritated. i should just stay cheerful and make the ppl around me smile and stay happy! that's RETARDED MARIA WU'S job rmb? (:

okay, im not exactly happy at my own results of HCL and CHEM today. rather sucky. cos its like, one mark to an A, an A2 at least for CHEM. and HCL?! i should be happy for scoring an A2 in 41984351billion years but apparently, for a perfectionist like me, im never contented. im just aiming higher for myself, adding on burden and giving myself my stress. cmon, i know i can survive and can do it! (:

things been happening every second. when old problems sink and be forgotten or are solved, new ones arise again. for this month, i think im really gonna face a big one and is still looking for a solution. haha. hais. now im getting used to it. like what munyee has mentioned, (or maybe her grandma mentioned) cest la vie, this is how life goes. guoyi, learn to face the fact. life's soooo full of obstacles you gotta cross, but think again, someone's gonna be at the end of the obstacle to congratulate you then, or perharps, that friend of yours is just rigth beside you always to secretly help you cross it. haha. (:

my 100th post! (:


its awesome fun. (: i love the HO family. haha. they bring me laughter, happiness and joy. thats what friends are for! thank God and bless them. hehe. i truthfully admit that i enjoyed the times with your going to random, stupid and nerdy places like discovery centres and science centres but guess what, in the end, i not only learn alot from there, i gained this bond with your too! haha. okay, i know im being mushy and idiotic, but yeahh, your have been great, supporting me all the way!!


especially for munyee:
havent really got you any present YET, though i helped daryl in buying one for you. so anytime, you want anything, name it, and i will get it for you! be it the stars or the moon, i shall just take a rocket and go to the outter space to pluck it down for you. im just afraid it would be too heavy for you to carry it home. haha. but actually, i thought i know you so well that you wouldnt ask for anything, so all i wanted to do for you was to plan this surprise party for you and really get you some time to enjoy life and take things off your mind. hope i really manage to do it and i really dont ask for a word of thanks. seeing you smile is way enough! but you know, i still have got many things to tell you, but i decided not to spoil your mood so yeahh, sorrie, will tell you some other time? you must take care kayy? guoyi the huggable is always here to listen and provide a shoulder! open for you 24hrs daily just like mcdonalds!

happy birthday. and all the best for you results. (; im right on time!

thanks melissa guo. thanks alot. enlightened me. haha. i think its true. so so true. if i have talked to you earlier, i think i wouldnt be so troubled. everything's solved. im feeling so light now. thank God.


so what if its my fault, its not necessary to apologise. cos you made me said all that and the problem doesnt all lie on me. you are part of it too. you may have made me smile several times but i guess the times i cried over you isnt much lesser. you dont deserve our friendship since you didnt try to earn it back. and i really want you to know that i may have lost a good brother, a special friend but you too, have lost an even better sis and a soulmate that you cant find out there just by the roadside. but still, even if i didnt call you up on the hp and apologise or continue this arguement and give you a chance to do some explanation, i wanna say sorrie here, for causing all the inconveniece to you on these over this period of time. its time for a thing like this to come to an end. im not sure if we still call it a friendship, but its gonna remain as stagnant as ever from now on. im not gonna let it affect me anymore. i thank you for everything you have ever done for me but that's it, im letting it go, for once.

not in the mood to blog now but i think im still gonna do it. i think i really needa apologise to my little sista. she brought back some nuggets and then when she found out that its my new addiciton, its already in my hands and i gave her the evil smile. i finished all of them even though im having a worse sorethroat than yesterday. cant blame me, my stomach's grumbling. wazzup with it? i need a doctor. sighh. im being soooooo unkind. ahh. sorrie. oh, did i just say sorrie? lol.

today school was short. then wondering whether to attend amaths. and i really wanted to. but my funny gastric pain forced me home. sighs. then tossed in bed cos i couldnt get a proper nap. so tell me, should i go see a doctor? my gastric's been like that more often these days. is it trying to say that it doesnt accept nuggets? haha. its okay. nvm... *ignores pain*


even though im feeling real sick now, i shall look forward to seeing munyee at west coast park tmr and then we can play together, bond a bit with the "family" and EAT NUGGETS!! hmm. i think i should just see a doctor later. ):

seems like blogger is down cos weisheng and daryl agreed with me. oh well, nvm, i shall just continue typing my post and see how later. and im conferencing with daryl and weisheng now discussing bout our big surprise on saturday... muahah! oops, i thought im not supposed to mention this since SHE'S READING THIS NOW, RIGHT HO MUNYEE!? haha. hmm, oh well, anyway, im going make it big for me since she's sucha best buddy of mine!!

today AEM wasnt good. ahh, told ya, i suck. look, i failed again. and i dont see where the problem lies. so what if i have got a full marks in my maths test? cmon, thats once in a sooooooo long. thats just purely luck. its lousy. looks ugly. and is not tasty. yuck. and guess what? i vomitted them out after i reached home too. LOL. i dont even appreciate my own food, who will? im just looking down on myself. whyy be a perfectionist when no one is perfect?